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Children want adults to show more respect for each other ahead of Anti-Bullying Week

Children want adults to show more respect for each other, as worrying numbers of 11 to 16 year-olds witness adults setting a bad example by bullying and disrespecting each other.

The results of a poll, published by the Anti-Bullying Alliance ahead of Anti-Bullying Week 2018, suggest that over four-in-ten children (41%) have seen adults bullying each other during the last six months, with an even greater number (60%) witnessing grown-ups being disrespectful to other adults.

Children said they saw much of the adult bullying take place face-to-face (21%), but had also come across it online (18%) or in the media (20%).

More than 4 in 5 of the children polled (87%) also reported having seen children bullying each other. The majority (76%) had seen this happen at school, with a third (34%) seeing it online and a quarter (27%) seeing it in their communities.

The results come as children continue to suffer on the receiving end of hurtful behavior. Nearly half of the children surveyed (45%) said they had been bullied face to face at least once during the last six months, with over a third (34%) saying they had been bullied online over the same period. Worryingly, the equivalent of one child in every classroom (4%) said they had been bullied face-to-face or online every day over the last six months.

However, nearly all children surveyed (98%) said that showing respect to each other is important and that it is possible to be respectful even if you disagree with someone else. 97% said adults should set a good example and show more respect for each other.

The Anti-Bullying Alliance, with the continued support of SafeToNet, is encouraging everyone to ‘Choose Respect’ during Anti-Bullying Week. The campaign, expected to be supported in approximately three-quarters of schools in England, takes place from 12 to 16 November.

CBeebies star Andy Day and Anti-Bullying Alliance patron, and his band Andy and the Odd Socks, have launched a new song in support of Anti-Bullying Week 2018 and are encouraging students to wear odd socks to school during the campaign to show their support and raise money for a good cause.

On Thursday of Anti-Bullying Week, the Anti-Bullying Alliance has teamed up with The Royal Foundation and The Duke of Cambridge to support their Royal Cyberbullying Taskforce to shine a spotlight on cyberbullying by holding ‘Stop Speak Support Day’ which encourages young people to become upstanders when they encounter bullying online.

Martha Evans, Director of the Anti-Bullying Alliance, said:
‘Children who experience bullying are at higher risk of experiencing a range of mental health issues and leaving school with fewer qualifications. The impact of bullying can last well in to adulthood. We need children to learn that we don’t have to be best friends with each other or always agree with each other but this is never an excuse for bullying or hurtful behavior. We must always choose respect. We are urging adults to role model the ‘choose respect’ message, and help us stop bullying in schools to prevent it from affecting so many children’s lives.’

Richard Pursey, CEO of SafeToNet, said:
‘SafeToNet is delighted to once again support Anti-Bullying Week. We’re passionate about safeguarding children’s online experience from all kinds of cyber abuse, while allowing them to enjoy all of the positive benefits that the internet and social media provide. Bullying, whether online or offline, can have a damaging effect on young people’s lives and we all need to do everything we can to choose and show respect.’

Anti-Bullying Week runs from 12 to 16 November 2018 – get involved at www.anti-bullyingalliance.org.uk / @ABAonline: #AntiBullyingWeek #ChooseRespect #OddSocks.

E-safety Support and Safeguarding Essentials members can download a selection of bullying resources which include assembly plans, parent guidance and staff training - login or join now!

• A poll of one thousand 11-16 year olds shows 97% would like adults to show more respect for each other.
  
• 41% of children have seen adults bullying each other during the last six months.
  
• Children themselves continue to experience bullying: nearly half (45%) say they have been bullied face to face, and 34% online, at least once during the last six months.
  
• The equivalent of one child in every classroom (4%) said they were being bullied face to face or online every day.
  
• Nearly all the children surveyed (98%) said that showing respect to each other is important and that it is possible to be respectful even if you disagree with someone else.
  
• Anti-Bullying Week runs from 12-16 November 2018 with the theme ‘Choose Respect’

It’s crucial to have open, honest chats with young people about the people they meet online.

A common message given to young people is: don’t speak to strangers online. This is primarily a safeguarding message; we recognise that strangers might pose risks and we want to protect our children from these.

But, what is a stranger to someone online?

The way that we interact with people online has changed, and for young people, a lot of this is due to online social gaming.

What is social gaming?

When I played games when I was younger, I’d either play by myself or have someone physically sitting next to me with a games controller. Nowadays, however, due to the speed of the Internet, we can play with others online and see what they’re doing in real-time; we call this social gaming. We can also chat to them via text or voice, adding to the experience and the immersion. We can choose to play games with our friends, but more and more games are encouraging players to play against people they don’t know… people we would refer to as ‘strangers’.

Why we need to change our terminology

Imagine the scenario: a child is playing an online game with a friend, and that friend invites one of his friends to play. Within a minute or two, the child may not perceive the new person as a stranger; they’ve become a new friend or acquaintance. It happened quickly, and as they were introduced by their friend, they’re more likely to be immediately trusted. We know that when people are online their behaviour changes and, in this scenario, due to the physical distance between players, the child would be more likely to engage in riskier behaviour (engaging with the ‘stranger’) than they would do in real life as their defences are lower.

We, therefore, may be better talking to children about ‘new people’ or ‘new players’ they meet online, rather than ‘strangers’.

The risks

It’s important that young people are made aware of the risks that meeting new people online can bring:

They may not be who they say they are and may be good at hiding their true identity;

They may be attempting to groom or harm by using emotional and/or persuasive strategies – this could involve trying to make video-chat arrangements;

They may be trying to arrange to meet in real-life;

They may be trying to find people online to bully.

Supporting young people

It’s crucial to have open, honest chats with young people about the people they meet online. Our key messages to them should include:

The importance of thinking before acting, and approaching new people with a level of scepticism, even if they’re friends of friends;

The knowledge that it’s easy to pretend to be someone else online;

The importance of blocking and/or reporting anyone online who’s pretending to be someone else;

The importance of speaking to trusted adults about people online who are frightening them or asking them to do things which make them feel uncomfortable.

Further links:
The Breck Foundation - (a story of someone who was groomed through gaming)

To ban or not ban mobile phones in schools - the debate continues

Back in June, Amanda Spielman, Ofsted Chief Inspector, supported schools who ban mobile phones, stating that their use in the classroom was "dubious" and that technology was to blame for "low-level disruption". This appeared to be supported by an LSE study which indicated that the banning of smartphones in schools boosted results. You can read more in our previous blog.

These comments and findings would suggest that a ban would be a positive action, although this is only seemingly supported in principle by the DfE.

In a recent speech at the Confederation of Schools Trusts conference, Damian Hinds, Secretary of State for Education, made reference to the recent ban in France. In his speech he stated that he believes "that kids in schools should not be on their phones", adding "I strongly support schools that ban phones. But when people asked me if I was going to follow the example of France and impose a national ban – I said no".

This leaves schools with the option to make the decision based on their own school experiences.

As reported in the Telegraph recently, schools are taking a number of different actions, from banning phones from school premises, having children hand in phones on arrival at school, "invisibility" polices and so on, supported by acceptable usage polices from both the students and parents.

However, taking a different approach is as school in Folkestone. Just last week, Kent Online reported that Folkestone School for Girls is not banning phones as they find them to be "valuable learning resources". The headteacher added "We do not have an endless list of dos and don'ts and trust and respect our girls to make informed and intelligent decisions about their own behaviour"

Have your say: Should mobile phones be banned in schools?

Do you think a ban would be beneficial in your school, or do you think that allowing children to have them in school can be useful for learning? Please use the comments section below to share your thoughts and experiences, or simply answer the question, should mobile phones be banned in schools.

You can now also take part on our mobile phone survey - all responses are anonymous. Click here to complete the short questionnaire